this is a reminder

It's ok to not get it right all the time. Experimenting is learning and learning is growing. 

(No but seriously, don't bake chewy butterscotch pieces into chocolate cookies because they will melt in the oven.)

double chocolate toasted coconut cookies will be your valentine

Happy Valentine's Day!

Every year, I like to take this day to reflect on all of the mistakes I've ever dated. Let's talk about ex-boyfriends!

One of my ex-boyfriends broke up with me seven times.

One of my ex-boyfriends cheated on me with one of my friends.

One of my ex-boyfriends told all of his friends that he wanted to break up with me a few months before he actually broke up with me. One of my ex-boyfriends broke up with me right before Valentine's Day. Oh wait, that was the same guy.

But double chocolate toasted coconut cookies? They've never cheated on me. They've never told me they had to work late and then go to strip clubs instead. They've never hand-painted a love lock for my birthday and then told me a couple months later that they don't want to be in a serious relationship. They've never told their best friend to call me to apologize on their behalf because they can't man up and do it themselves. They've never broken up with me the day before my birthday because they didn't feel like buying me a present.

my kind of valentine

how to fall in love with roasted balsamic strawberry tarts

Last month the New York Times published an article called "To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This" as part of their Modern Love series. In it, the author shared a story of how she used a method developed by a psychologist to fall in love with a male acquaintance. The method involves asking each other 36 specific questions and then, at the very end, staring into one another's eyes for four minutes. The questions progress from typical icebreakers ("What would constitute a 'perfect' day for you?") to diary-only territory ("If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you must regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?").

You know what else the New York Times loves to talk about lately? Self-absorbed social activists unashamedly living in their parent's basement. Jobless left wing selfie aficionados. Binge-drinking environmentally conscious dating app veterans. Unpaid interns. Startup founders. Social media celebrities. That's right - I'm talking millennials. The seemingly contradictory and totally fascinating generation.

hold your horses, i'm getting to this in a second

Well I tweaked the list of 36 questions and the four minute exercise in a way that's specifically designed to make millennials fall in love - just in time for Valentine's Day! (Bonus: you can see the original question if you hover over the text.)

To fall in love as a millennial, do this:

wild blueberry crumble muffins

It's a new year again and I've been spending a lot of time reflecting on the things I've learned about myself in the past quarter century. 

I know that I am the kind of person who has a favorite UN office but not a favorite football team. I know I will do almost anything to avoid public speaking, but I still want everyone to hear everything I have to say. I know that if dessert were a cuisine, it would be my favorite. I know that I am an outgoing introvert and I like other outgoing introverts. I know that my perfect day involves farmers markets and sunshine and the New York Times in print and live music and bubble baths. I know that I'm a feminist and totally not conflicted about saying that. I know that I express affection through cooking and hugs. I know that I used to want people to think of me as cool and pretty, but now I only care that they think of me as smart and interesting. I know that I'll probably never finish Infinite Jest. I know that I want a life partner that's a mixture of John Oliver and Frederick Douglass. I know that my weaknesses are champagne and massages.

I know that wild blueberry muffins with crumbly tops are my favorite kind of muffin. And I know that you're gonna love these little morsels of deliciousness.

the best kind of muffin top

roasted cherry tomato tart

I've lived in five places in the past five years - college in western Massachusetts at the step of the Berkshires, a semester abroad in London, a couple years spent in Washington DC as a federal government employee, a year as a graduate student in Paris, and now a year as a graduate student in New York City. I'm a lucky punk, I know. 

But moving around a lot has downsides. Saying goodbye to friends always sucks. Learning new city transit systems always means making a few mistakes in the beginning (seriously, how many times will I enter the uptown entrance when I actually mean to go downtown?). Long distance relationships are the worst. Becoming a regular at a bar or café always takes at least a couple months. 

New cities also mean making new friends. And making friends doesn't come super easily to me, so I always have a game plan every time I move somewhere new. Mostly that involves bribing people into being my friends by cooking for them.

they come for the food but stay for the katherine

cod chowder for the soul

Sometimes things happen. Sometimes you go to Paris to study for a year and neglect your cooking blog because your entire kitchen is two hotplates and a microwave. Sometimes you get accepted to a dual-degree program at Columbia and come back to the States and then proceed to have major FOMO when you see your friends having fun all over Europe without you. Sometimes the guy you were head over heels for decides he doesn't want to be in a relationship and tells you so via text message. Sometimes your new conservative landlord tries to debate you about the weaknesses of the Affordable Care Act because he found out you worked at the White House but all you want to do is take a nap because you were just at IKEA for four and a half hours of your life (but really it felt like eternity).

In times of stress, annoyance, FOMO, anger, heartbreak, anxiety, frustration, the mean reds, the blues, or any other horrible feelings, I like to make some from-scratch-with-love cod chowder, mopped up to the last drop with some fresh sourdough bread. And then suddenly I'm happy to be right where I am and my FOMO disappears and boys don't exist and I feel like I could debate anyone about anything and singlehandedly assemble all of the furniture in the IKEA warehouse! I'm not even exaggerating. Try it sometime. 

serious comfort food.

whole wheat garlic knots and fresh marinara sauce

I've been living in Paris for over a week now, so I'm going to write about French food another favorite American staple: garlic knots and marinara sauce. To healthify it, I'm talking about whole wheat garlic knots and fresh marinara sauce. But not until after I prattle on for a bit about how things are going in la belle France.